Breakup is the end of a relationship between two people. It might be because of anything like incompatibility, family problems, trust issues, etc,.. Getting out of the pain of losing a person in life is not an easy task as we might think.
“You will not heal by going back to what broke you”
Here are the some useful tips to get through a breakup…
1.Take Some Time Apart
Whether it was an ugly or amicable breakup, time apart is helpful. The time it takes to get over a breakup will vary, but a good rule of thumb is 6 months.
THE SIX MONTH RULE
Avoid any communication or contact for 6 months to fully heal from a break up. This six months give you enough time to reconnect with yourself and reflect on your values.
2. Be Patient And Allow Yourself To Grieve The Loss
Going through a breakup can be a traumatic experience. The grief associated with breakup is similar to losing a loved one from death. One study showed the bereavement/loss symptoms overlap in both contexts.
There is no time limit for grief. It varies from person to person. A study found that it takes an average of 3-5 months to heal from a breakup while recovering after divorce takes a minimum of 1.5 years. Allow yourself time to process the loss and be patient as you heal from it.
3. Prioritize Effective Self-Care
In a study, researchers found that those who were broken up with tend to experience depression, loss of self-esteem, and rumination. On the other side, the one who did the breaking up experienced the social cost of being perceived as cruel or heartless. A lot of negative emotions are associated with breakup, such as feeling sad, confused and scared. This is why practicing self-care is crucial for both.
4. Follow Healthy Social Media Practices
If you can, try avoiding spaces on social media that might remind you of your past love life. But if you can’t avoid them, make an effort to unfollow or mute your ex’s accounts and the people close to them because seeing these reminders can be painful and can also prompt you to contact them again.
5. Seek Help From The Right People
If you think that breakup is a valid reason to see a therapist, it absolutely is. There are relationship therapists out there who specialize in processing grief from breakups. Therapists can also help you re-discover yourself again if you feel like you’ve lost yourself in the relationship.
In general, therapists can help with substituting unhealthy coping strategies with positive or neutral ones, addressing depression or anxiety, and working with you on a post-breakup plan.
6. Try To Avoid Ruminating
It’s helpful to talk to a trusted friend or relative about the breakup, it can allow you to process it better. However, avoid ruminating on the negative thoughts repeatedly. Rumination leads to re-experiencing the memory over and over. This can be exhausting and will negatively impact your mental health. when you catch yourself ruminating, try to distract yourself with the things that uplift you.
TRY THESE STRATEGIES TO UPLIFT YOURSELF
- Watch a show you love
- Try out a craft
- Find time to do a nature walk
- Go to shopping
- Listen to your favorite music
- Read inspirational stories